A couple of weeks ago I was flipping through channels and happened to catch the end of Taken. In the film a teenage girl who is kidnapped and sold as a sex slave. Little did the kidnappers know that the girl’s father, played by Liam Neeson, was a super spy who would proceed to hunt them down from halfway across the globe. The part that struck me was after Neeson took out the last bad guy to free his daughter. She fell into his arms, tears streaming down her face, and said “You came for me…you came for me.” His response was, “I told you I would.” That was the first time that this girl truly knew that her father loved her. It completely changed her and their relationship.
How I long for my children to know the love Lisa and I have for them. If they learn nothing else while they are in our house, I want them to know the fact that we love them because I believe there is nothing else that will shape who they are more than that. Why do I say that? If they know love from us, it will make more sense to them that their Father in heaven loves them the same way. And knowing that love changes everything.
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Jan 1, 2010
May 12, 2009
Fellowship Monologue
Fellowship. Its a relatively common word among Christians, but I've pretty much never used it in any other context. The word itself has no functional meaning to most Americans. You never hear athletes talk about the "fellowship" they have with other guys in the locker room. Joe College Guy never uses fellowship to describe hanging out with the dudes on his floor. Its a strange word in our culture, and I wonder if there's another word or phrase that would communicate the idea more clearly.
But in spite of that, we do need to understand what it means. And I would argue that most Christians don't really know what the scriptures are saying when they talk about fellowship. And in addition to the question of what fellowship is, I would ask this: do we need it? The assumption in virtually every Christian circle is yes, but biblically I don't think that holds water. First, though, what is fellowship?
I don't really want to come up with a definition in the strict sense; I'd like to try a different way of defining it. But I will mention the Greek word most commonly translated as fellowship: koinonia. It appears 20 times in the NT, notably Acts 2:42, where the believers in Jerusalem have fellowship with one another and all things in common, and 1 John 1, where he speaks of our fellowship with Christ and with one another. Koinonia relates to participation and community, and I think those ideas are at the core of what it means.
Interestingly enough, those passages aren't the ones that tend to come up in the discussions I have with others about fellowship. For me the conversation about fellowship begins like this:
Person X: "Where do you go to church?"
Me: "We don't." (sometimes I give a longer response)
Person X: "Oh......then what do you do for fellowship?"
Me: "Well, we meet with some other believers in homes."
Person X: "Just as long as you aren't forsaking the gathering of the bretheren......"
The passage they often refer to is Hebrews 10:24-25:
"...let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds, not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near." (NAS)
I appreciate the intent behind those questions. Its usually out of genuine concern for me and my family. But at the same time I'm not sure it comes from a full understanding of what fellowship is. Most folks stop reading in the first half of verse 25--"do not forsake assembling together." But the writer isn't just saying get together with other Christians; he elaborates: encourage one another....stimulate one another to love and good deeds. Its not getting together, its what happens when you do. There's 'one-anothering' that ought to go on when we come together.
But what happens in the majority of gatherings? One brother gets up in front and gives a lecture while everyone else sits and listens. Greetings are exchanged (sometimes only when dude up front tells you to.....), and everyone goes on their way. Don't get me wrong--lectures are fine. I've heard many great lectures. But that ain't fellowship. And yet, if I'd responded to the question by saying, "we go to da-ta-da-ta-da church," they probably wouldn't have thought twice about it. Of course, I know not every gathering is like that. This isn't at all about institution vs. non-institution. Gatherings in homes can be devoid of fellowship in the same way--I've been to some that are. It's very different than that.
Here's the thing: 'fellowship' is held over the heads of many Christians as something that we need. We're told we have to be in fellowship or we'll go off the deep end. And sometimes examples are cited of folks who left and now who knows what's happened to them. But do the scriptures say we need it? I would say no. In fact, there are numerous examples of folks who didn't have fellowship for long periods of time. Consider:
- Moses was in the desert for 40 years;
- John was exiled on Patmos, and he seemed to do just fine;
- John the Baptist lived alone in the wilderness for a long time;
- Paul spent more time alone in a prison cell than with other believers in the later years of his life.
These men didn't set out to be certain they had fellowship/community/another person who followed God with them in whatever they did. They followed Him, and that led them into times of great and deep fellowship, as well as times of being alone.
Another side of it is that fellowship may not happen in the way we would expect. Personally, I've been in a situation with less fellowship recently, and what we've had has looked very different than I thought it would. When we moved to Champaign we knew some believers that were already here, but a lot of the relationships never developed into a "meet together weekly or more frequently" sort of thing (for a variety of reasons....and not because we didn't want them to). The most significant fellowship I’ve had since moving here has been with Lisa. For some reason I feel that we are trained not to associate ‘fellowship’ with our family conversations, but in reality that’s a big part of why we got married. We have always had deep fellowship with one another; I’ve just grown to appreciate that more.
But apart from that I think Father had a two and a half year period of less fellowship in store for us when we came here. We talked about attending a Sunday gathering, and even went to a couple of meetings. We had folks over to our place in hopes of something starting. We met in another family's home for a while. We have enjoyed the time with believers that we've had here, and we'll probably keep in touch with some of the folks. But none of it really became what I expected: a group of Christians we can share life with in a deeper way. A lot of it seemed like us trying to make something happen that the Lord didn't want.
Then, I walk off of the plane in San Antonio for my audition in January, and within 12 hours I've had deep, significant fellowship in Christ with a group of 20ish Christians I'd never met. I had a sense immediately that these were believers that we could live life with. It was to the point where I didn't really care about getting the job; I wanted to move and hang out with these people. It has been so easy since He has orchestrated it, and it was like banging my head against the wall when we tried to do it ourselves. As I've reflected on our time in Illinois, I think Father wanted us to have less fellowship. There were things that needed to be worked out in me, and chances are that wouldn't have happened if things had been different.
Would we have rather had more fellowship while we were here? Absolutely! Did we die spiritually because we didn't have it? Quite the opposite. Did we violate the scripture from Hebrews 10? I don't think so. All it says is "don't forsake." If there are believers God wants you to meet with, meet with them. Don't blow that off. Taking the verse beyond that is an exaggeration. I don't think it means you have to meet with whatever group of Christians is in your town. Even if you find a group, fellowship is deeper than just getting together with other Christians. He needs to lead us. And if there isn't anyone around that He wants you to meet with, He will sustain you, just like He sustained Paul and John. And they didn't just get by--they flourished.
So about fellowship I would say this: its deeper and different than just meeting together, it isn't a requirement, you won't go off the deep end if you don't have it, and God Himself will lead you into it.
But in spite of that, we do need to understand what it means. And I would argue that most Christians don't really know what the scriptures are saying when they talk about fellowship. And in addition to the question of what fellowship is, I would ask this: do we need it? The assumption in virtually every Christian circle is yes, but biblically I don't think that holds water. First, though, what is fellowship?
I don't really want to come up with a definition in the strict sense; I'd like to try a different way of defining it. But I will mention the Greek word most commonly translated as fellowship: koinonia. It appears 20 times in the NT, notably Acts 2:42, where the believers in Jerusalem have fellowship with one another and all things in common, and 1 John 1, where he speaks of our fellowship with Christ and with one another. Koinonia relates to participation and community, and I think those ideas are at the core of what it means.
Interestingly enough, those passages aren't the ones that tend to come up in the discussions I have with others about fellowship. For me the conversation about fellowship begins like this:
Person X: "Where do you go to church?"
Me: "We don't." (sometimes I give a longer response)
Person X: "Oh......then what do you do for fellowship?"
Me: "Well, we meet with some other believers in homes."
Person X: "Just as long as you aren't forsaking the gathering of the bretheren......"
The passage they often refer to is Hebrews 10:24-25:
"...let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds, not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near." (NAS)
I appreciate the intent behind those questions. Its usually out of genuine concern for me and my family. But at the same time I'm not sure it comes from a full understanding of what fellowship is. Most folks stop reading in the first half of verse 25--"do not forsake assembling together." But the writer isn't just saying get together with other Christians; he elaborates: encourage one another....stimulate one another to love and good deeds. Its not getting together, its what happens when you do. There's 'one-anothering' that ought to go on when we come together.
But what happens in the majority of gatherings? One brother gets up in front and gives a lecture while everyone else sits and listens. Greetings are exchanged (sometimes only when dude up front tells you to.....), and everyone goes on their way. Don't get me wrong--lectures are fine. I've heard many great lectures. But that ain't fellowship. And yet, if I'd responded to the question by saying, "we go to da-ta-da-ta-da church," they probably wouldn't have thought twice about it. Of course, I know not every gathering is like that. This isn't at all about institution vs. non-institution. Gatherings in homes can be devoid of fellowship in the same way--I've been to some that are. It's very different than that.
Here's the thing: 'fellowship' is held over the heads of many Christians as something that we need. We're told we have to be in fellowship or we'll go off the deep end. And sometimes examples are cited of folks who left and now who knows what's happened to them. But do the scriptures say we need it? I would say no. In fact, there are numerous examples of folks who didn't have fellowship for long periods of time. Consider:
- Moses was in the desert for 40 years;
- John was exiled on Patmos, and he seemed to do just fine;
- John the Baptist lived alone in the wilderness for a long time;
- Paul spent more time alone in a prison cell than with other believers in the later years of his life.
These men didn't set out to be certain they had fellowship/community/another person who followed God with them in whatever they did. They followed Him, and that led them into times of great and deep fellowship, as well as times of being alone.
Another side of it is that fellowship may not happen in the way we would expect. Personally, I've been in a situation with less fellowship recently, and what we've had has looked very different than I thought it would. When we moved to Champaign we knew some believers that were already here, but a lot of the relationships never developed into a "meet together weekly or more frequently" sort of thing (for a variety of reasons....and not because we didn't want them to). The most significant fellowship I’ve had since moving here has been with Lisa. For some reason I feel that we are trained not to associate ‘fellowship’ with our family conversations, but in reality that’s a big part of why we got married. We have always had deep fellowship with one another; I’ve just grown to appreciate that more.
But apart from that I think Father had a two and a half year period of less fellowship in store for us when we came here. We talked about attending a Sunday gathering, and even went to a couple of meetings. We had folks over to our place in hopes of something starting. We met in another family's home for a while. We have enjoyed the time with believers that we've had here, and we'll probably keep in touch with some of the folks. But none of it really became what I expected: a group of Christians we can share life with in a deeper way. A lot of it seemed like us trying to make something happen that the Lord didn't want.
Then, I walk off of the plane in San Antonio for my audition in January, and within 12 hours I've had deep, significant fellowship in Christ with a group of 20ish Christians I'd never met. I had a sense immediately that these were believers that we could live life with. It was to the point where I didn't really care about getting the job; I wanted to move and hang out with these people. It has been so easy since He has orchestrated it, and it was like banging my head against the wall when we tried to do it ourselves. As I've reflected on our time in Illinois, I think Father wanted us to have less fellowship. There were things that needed to be worked out in me, and chances are that wouldn't have happened if things had been different.
Would we have rather had more fellowship while we were here? Absolutely! Did we die spiritually because we didn't have it? Quite the opposite. Did we violate the scripture from Hebrews 10? I don't think so. All it says is "don't forsake." If there are believers God wants you to meet with, meet with them. Don't blow that off. Taking the verse beyond that is an exaggeration. I don't think it means you have to meet with whatever group of Christians is in your town. Even if you find a group, fellowship is deeper than just getting together with other Christians. He needs to lead us. And if there isn't anyone around that He wants you to meet with, He will sustain you, just like He sustained Paul and John. And they didn't just get by--they flourished.
So about fellowship I would say this: its deeper and different than just meeting together, it isn't a requirement, you won't go off the deep end if you don't have it, and God Himself will lead you into it.
Jan 12, 2009
News
If it wasn't obvious, blogging has moved even farther down the list of things to do in the last six months. I have a few things I'll try to get to this week before classes start next Tuesday (when free time will disappear again), but I wanted to write about the way God has led our family in the last couple of months.
I can point to several points in my life where God has spoken very clearly to me through monetary things. Going to college, time on staff with InterVarsity, traveling to Egypt, going to grad school.....God spoke very clearly through financial means in all of these instances. So when I scheduled a saxophone audition with the Air Force Band of the West in San Antonio, TX, I took note of the ways that he took care of the expenses for the trip (they don't pay to fly you down).
First, a free plane ticket was given to us. Then, someone said they wanted to pay for a rental car, which I needed to get around while I was there. Then, a stranger offered to let me stay in his home for free while I was there (more on this in a moment). And after that someone gave me some extra money for food, gas, etc. So instead of potentially dropping $800 on getting to Texas, I was basically going for free. We were thankful.....
I arrived on Saturday night for a Monday audition and drove to Adam's home. Adam posted a comment on house churches in a random forum this summer, and Lisa found his info through an internet search. I told him a bit about myself and asked if I could stay with him, and he said ok. I was excited to have been divinely placed in the home of a brother with whom I could so quickly have real fellowship. Not only that, but Sunday morning I went with him to a meeting with a group of believers and was greatly blessed to hear their testimony of Jesus. It was indeed a joyous trip, and I hadn't even done what I originally went to do.
It almost seemed too good to be true, so I figured there was no way I would actually win the audition. Six of us were there to play, and I was chosen to play first in the morning round. I sought to walk humbly with Jesus as I went, and He heard me as I asked for peace while I played. They picked prepared pieces that I was very comfortable with, and I had played the two most difficult "sight-reading" excerpts. After playing and then sitting around for a couple of hours I found out I was one of the four selected to move on.
The second round consisted of playing lead alto with their big band (they have a concert band and a big band) and improvising. All of that went very well, and after another couple of hours they told me I was the one they wanted. Lisa and I waited until today to formally accept the position, just to allow God time to speak if He wanted. But as I look back on the experience, I think I can say that this is one of the most clear ways that God has spoken to me (us) in some time. We are thankful to have a job in a time when many are losing theirs, and to know some believers in the new city we are moving to. I'm excited to see what He has in store for us there....
....after basic training. :)
I can point to several points in my life where God has spoken very clearly to me through monetary things. Going to college, time on staff with InterVarsity, traveling to Egypt, going to grad school.....God spoke very clearly through financial means in all of these instances. So when I scheduled a saxophone audition with the Air Force Band of the West in San Antonio, TX, I took note of the ways that he took care of the expenses for the trip (they don't pay to fly you down).
First, a free plane ticket was given to us. Then, someone said they wanted to pay for a rental car, which I needed to get around while I was there. Then, a stranger offered to let me stay in his home for free while I was there (more on this in a moment). And after that someone gave me some extra money for food, gas, etc. So instead of potentially dropping $800 on getting to Texas, I was basically going for free. We were thankful.....
I arrived on Saturday night for a Monday audition and drove to Adam's home. Adam posted a comment on house churches in a random forum this summer, and Lisa found his info through an internet search. I told him a bit about myself and asked if I could stay with him, and he said ok. I was excited to have been divinely placed in the home of a brother with whom I could so quickly have real fellowship. Not only that, but Sunday morning I went with him to a meeting with a group of believers and was greatly blessed to hear their testimony of Jesus. It was indeed a joyous trip, and I hadn't even done what I originally went to do.
It almost seemed too good to be true, so I figured there was no way I would actually win the audition. Six of us were there to play, and I was chosen to play first in the morning round. I sought to walk humbly with Jesus as I went, and He heard me as I asked for peace while I played. They picked prepared pieces that I was very comfortable with, and I had played the two most difficult "sight-reading" excerpts. After playing and then sitting around for a couple of hours I found out I was one of the four selected to move on.
The second round consisted of playing lead alto with their big band (they have a concert band and a big band) and improvising. All of that went very well, and after another couple of hours they told me I was the one they wanted. Lisa and I waited until today to formally accept the position, just to allow God time to speak if He wanted. But as I look back on the experience, I think I can say that this is one of the most clear ways that God has spoken to me (us) in some time. We are thankful to have a job in a time when many are losing theirs, and to know some believers in the new city we are moving to. I'm excited to see what He has in store for us there....
....after basic training. :)
May 31, 2007
Waxing prose.......
I was in Des Moines last weekend for my brother's graduation. I had an interesting moment as I was walking around the neighborhood where my parents live and recalled what has happened since we moved there almost twelve years ago. I've gone to college, gotten married, and moved out of state. My brother has grown up, as have the two kids that lived in the house next door. The neighbors on the other side have gotten divorced, and their kids have had kids out of wedlock. The folks behind us have dealt with the sorrow of the death of one child, the joy of the birth of another, and multiple heart attacks for his dad. And the tiny house across the street has had at least three owners and is now on sale for over $120,000-- way too much if you ask me.
Then I looked at the tree out in front of our house. I remember John climbing to the top when he was younger, and now it seems almost twice as high. It provides much more shade than it used to, as do the other trees around our house. Those trees were there long before we moved in, and they stand a chance to be there long after Mom and Dad head somewhere else. They've seen the hottest of summers, the dead of winter, storm after storm, and who knows how many people, and they still stand strong. This passage seemed appropriate:
"The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me, because the LORD has anointed me to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound; to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor, and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all who mourn; to grant to those who mourn in Zion--to give them a beautiful headdress instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, the garment of praise instead of a faint spirit; that they may be called oaks of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he may be glorified." Isaiah 61:1-3
Lord, help us to comfort those who mourn, that they and we may be oaks of righteousness for Your glory. May we stand strong in You while the world changes around us.
Then I looked at the tree out in front of our house. I remember John climbing to the top when he was younger, and now it seems almost twice as high. It provides much more shade than it used to, as do the other trees around our house. Those trees were there long before we moved in, and they stand a chance to be there long after Mom and Dad head somewhere else. They've seen the hottest of summers, the dead of winter, storm after storm, and who knows how many people, and they still stand strong. This passage seemed appropriate:
"The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me, because the LORD has anointed me to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound; to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor, and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all who mourn; to grant to those who mourn in Zion--to give them a beautiful headdress instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, the garment of praise instead of a faint spirit; that they may be called oaks of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he may be glorified." Isaiah 61:1-3
Lord, help us to comfort those who mourn, that they and we may be oaks of righteousness for Your glory. May we stand strong in You while the world changes around us.
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